Adding insult to O-less, since her move, she has an oversexed neighbor with the loudest late-night wallbanging she’s ever heard. Each moan, spank, and – was that a meow? – punctuates the fact that not only is she losing sleep, she still has, yep, you guessed it, no O.
Enter Simon Parker. (No, really, Simon, please enter.) When the wallbanging threatens to literally bounce her out of bed, Caroline, clad in sexual frustration and a pink baby-doll nightie, confronts her heard-but-never-seen neighbor. Their late-night hallway encounter has, well, mixed results. Ahem. With walls this thin, the tension’s gonna be thick…
In her third novel, Alice Clayton returns to dish her trademark mix of silly and steamy. Banter, barbs, and strutting pussycats, plus the sexiest apple pie ever made, are dunked in a hot tub and set against the gorgeous San Francisco skyline in this hot and hilarious tale of exasperation at first sight.
First Sentence: “Oh, God.”
I was originally planning to steer clear away from Wallbanger. I rarely read adult books that I did not request from NetGalley and Wallbanger looked like nothing special that would catch my attention. Also, with a title and cover like that, the book screamed SEX. (Did you know that I once thought that the guy on the cover had the girl’s legs as his hands? It took about three minutes of me staring hard at the cover to realize that no, his hands weren’t actually legs; there was just a girl behind him.) To be more specific, I thought Wallbanger would be full of sex and have practically no plot, unless you count sex as plot. However, I was dead wrong. To my surprise, I read and enjoyed Wallbanger so much that I not only re-read it two times that same week, but four times.
“That’s Wallbanger?” Sophia screeched.
“Wait a minute, that’s Pink Nightie Girl?” Neil laughed, and Mimi and Ryan snorted. (51)
Wallbanger starts off with a big thump. Caroline had just moved to her new apartment and is trying to sleep when she hears a huge disturbance next door – specifically moans, grunts, and tons of wall banging. After enduring this for three nights, Caroline had finally gotten enough and confronted the guy next door – Simon. From there on, the book was amazing, not that it wasn’t amazing already. I’ve never read such a strong engaging beginning in an adult novel like the one Wallbanger has.
The chemistry between Caroline and Simon is so electrifying. As I was reading, I can feel the sexual tension jumping out at me right from the pages. The puns and conversations both Caroline and Simon had was so sexually charged and so hilarious at the same time that it could entertain me for hours, hence me re-reading Wallbanger four times without getting bored once. In fact, I can re-read Wallbanger ten more times and never be bored of it.
“What brought this on, friend?” he whispered into my hair, and I shivered.
“Delayed reaction to Linda Blair. I need some nook time. Friends can nook, can’t they?” (123)
I wish I can have someone like Simon in my life. Caroline can talk to Simon about anything – he gets her quirky sense of humor, is there for her the minute she screams, and treats her with actual respect.
[MILD] SPOILER: Simon refused to sleep with Caroline when she was willing and drunk, even though he really wanted her, because he wanted her to be sober when they finally get together. Most of all, he knows it’s wrong and doesn’t want to take advantage of her weak state.
I mean, what kind of guy would do that?
And let’s not forget Clive. Who is Clive you ask? Well, Clive is Caroline’s brilliant cat. I feel that Clive plays the role of being the comic relief in Wallbanger. Everything Clive does is hilarious – he will pee in Simon’s sweatshirt, attack Simon because he’s overprotective of Caroline, and even tries to seduce someone. Don’t hate me, but I don’t like cats at all. However, Clive managed to grab my attention and win my heart. He is definitely a cat with a huge personality.
Then Clive jumped up on the back of the couch, put his bum right in Simon’s face, and killed that real quick. We both laughed, and Simon moved away from me as I explained to Clive that it was not polite to do that to company. Clive seemed oddly pleased with himself, though, so I knew he was up to something. (103)
A downside to Wallbanger is that Caroline talks about something we don’t normally see in other books – her O – “O” being orgasm. Caroline treats her orgasm like a real person, sort of how Ana from Fifty Shades of Grey treats her inner goddess as a real person. Caroline doesn’t mention her O much and when she does bring it up, it’s not as annoying as other people say it is.
In the end, I’m giving Wallbanger four thump thump thump stars and I would recommend this book to everyone. Don’t be fooled by the cover like me, Wallbanger is an amazing read and I don’t say this lightly.