There’s only one problem: she’s not sure she has the courage to do it alone. But once she discovers the website Smooth Passages and its section called Suicide Partners, Aysel’s convinced she’s found her solution. Better yet, a boy with the username FrozenRobot (aka Roman), who’s haunted by a family tragedy, is looking for a partner.
But as their suicide pact starts to become more concrete, Aysel begins to question whether she really wants to go through with it. Ultimately, she must choose between wanting to die or trying to convince Roman to live so they can discover the potential of their energy together. Except that Roman may not be so easy to convince.
This is a gorgeously written and compulsively readable debut novel about the transformative power of love and acceptance.
First Sentence: Music, especially classical music, especially Mozart’s Requiem Mass in D Minor, has kinetic energy.
When I first saw My Heart and Other Black Holes‘s original cover, I was automatically interested in it, but was too lazy to check what it was about. It wasn’t until I started hearing people talking about My Heart and Other Black Holes that I finally looked at what the book was about and just like that, I needed My Heart and Other Black Holes in my life. I don’t know if you guys watched the episode of Criminal Minds where there was a website of people being convinced to play a suicide game with a suicide partner (and killer) who convinced people to tape their own suicide, but My Heart and Other Black Holes totally reminded me of Criminal Minds and being a huge fan of Criminal Minds, I needed My Heart and Other Black Holes asap.
…I wonder what my classmates are going to do with all their hate and anger and fear once they don’t have me here anymore.
I can’t wait until they don’t have me here anymore. (ARC 18)
My Heart and Other Black Holes is FULLLL of beautiful thought-provoking quotes. Like, there are so many beautiful and relatable quotes every two or so pages that I just had to stop reading and write them down. The quotes are deep, full of feeling, and just so good. You guys will get what I mean when you read the book for yourselves.
I never expected My Heart and Other Black Holes to make me cry (don’t ask me why, the synopsis does scream THIS BOOK WILL MAKE YOU CRY, doesn’t it?) – I was tearing up majorly while I was reading My Heart and Other Black Holes on the train. Thank goodness my bangs were blocking other people from seeing my eyes and I could casually wipe my tears away without anyone noticing. But seriously, get some tissues ready when you start this one.
Maybe that’s a side effect of knowing you’re about to die: none of your secrets matter anymore. After you’re gone, they’ll all be discovered anyway. Pored over by other people. (ARC 125)
Right from the beginning of My Heart and Other Black Hole, I automatically connected with Aysel. I loved her personality, her attitude, and pretty much everything about her. However, as I read on, I felt myself growing more and more disconnected from her and the entire book. It was completely unexpected and I don’t know why I felt that way. Maybe it’s because of the next problem that I’m going to mention.
My main problem with My Heart and Other Black Holes is the romance, which is a huge part of the book as you can tell from the book’s summary since it may change Aysel and Roman’s feelings about committing suicide. I’m sorry, but I just didn’t feel it. I didn’t see the transition from sort of friends to suddenly, I have deep feelings for him, so deep that I don’t want to die so I can be and live with him in my life. To me, it seems like Aysel constantly annoys Roman and suddenly, without any warning, she likes him and he likes her back and she doesn’t want to die anymore? Whaat? Where did that suddenly come from? Am I missing something? The romance just developed too fast for me to really support or be invested in it.
I’m beginning to learn that this is the exhilarating and puzzling and frankly, the frustrating thing about love. Things that matter to the other person start to seem intriguing, even if they are actually quite trite when you really think about them. (ARC 242)
Another problem I have with My Heart and Other Black Holes is that when I finished reading the book, I felt like it was lacking something, but at the same time, I don’t know what it was lacking. Maybe it’s because My Heart and Other Black Holes doesn’t portray its message well. Maybe it’s because I was bored with some parts of the book. Maybe it’s because I lost my connection with Aysel halfway through the book. The thing is, I don’t know what My Heart and Other Black Holes is lacking and it’s very hard to tell what it is.
Overall, I did enjoy reading My Heart and Other Black Holes, but sadly not enough to give it a higher rating than three stars. Believe me, I’ve spent a lot of time debating what rating I should give it, torn between giving it a higher rating or leaving it as it is. Either way, I will definitely recommend My Heart and Other Black Holes just for the fact that it has tons of beautiful thought-provoking quotes.